Give the Best of You to Yourself First

Our latest WomenShare Podcast episode with Cokie Cox really lit a fire in me. Cokie is a powerhouse—wealth advisor, business owner, speaker, and author of Perfect Day, a book that challenges us to live with intention in the areas that matter most. Her message reminded me of a truth I’ve been leaning into more and more lately:

We owe it to ourselves to give the best of us to ourselves first.

That might sound a little radical—especially for women in demanding careers, juggling calendars, clients, kids, giving back and running teams. But hear me out: If we don’t make space to center ourselves, no one else will. And when we do, the ripple effects are undeniable.

The Morning Shift That Changed Everything

A few years ago, I read The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod. And while it made sense to me intellectually, I didn’t truly live it until recently. I think I finally got to the point where the question of "If not now, when?" became very clear. Now, my mornings are sacred. I don’t reach for my phone. I don’t open my email. I start with me—movement, journaling, and sometimes meditation.

It’s not about having hours of free time (who does?). It’s about claiming even 10 to 15 minutes that are just for you—to move your body, hear your own thoughts, and begin the day grounded instead of reactive. And if mornings aren't realistic for you, pick any time of day where you can tune the world out and tune in to yourself.

If you’re new to this and unsure where to begin, the Five-Minute Journal is a great entry point. It’s simple, structured, and incredibly effective at shifting your mindset. And, as the title says, it only takes five minutes of your time.

This Isn't Just for Solopreneurs

Let me be clear: You don’t have to be self-employed to do this. Although the complete freedom to start my work day at the time of my choosing is a big benefit of my solopreneur journey.

If you’re in a full-time role—leading a team, meeting with clients, or managing a full plate—you can still carve out space for yourself. In fact, you must. And it starts with boundaries.

Maybe it looks like waking up 30 minutes earlier. Maybe it’s blocking off your calendar from 8–9 am and treating it like your most important meeting (because it is). If you’re more productive in the morning, don’t waste that golden window on emails or meetings—use it for deep work that moves the needle.

As someone who used to get annoyed when someone's calendar was booked with 'buffer time', I have seen the light. I’ve worked with a coach who helped me stop defaulting to “being available” and instead protect the time of day when I’m most effective. That shift has been a game-changer—not just in terms of output, but in how I feel throughout the day.

Practice Defensive Calendaring—and Stick to It

Here’s something that doesn’t get talked about enough: protecting your calendar isn’t selfish—it’s strategic.

We often block time for ourselves—whether it’s deep work, prep time, or even a lunch break—but when someone asks to “just grab 30 minutes,” we cave. Over time, that slowly chips away at the priorities we promised ourselves we’d honor.

That’s where defensive calendaring comes in.

Think of it as setting up guardrails for your week:

• Block your most productive windows for focused work

• Schedule buffer time between meetings to reset and refocus

• Create recurring “no meeting” windows—even if it’s just an hour or two a day

• And most importantly, respect your own boundaries like you’d respect someone else’s

The more consistent you are with it, the more others will start to respect it too. It’s not about being rigid. It’s about being intentional—so your calendar reflects what matters, not just what’s loudest.

Build a Life You Don't Have to Escape From

I’ll say it again: Give the best of you to yourself first. Before the inbox. Before the meetings. Before the world starts pulling at your energy.

Not because it’s trendy. But because you deserve to feel grounded, present, and powerful in your own life.

And here's the truth: When we do that, we’re able to give so much more to the people we lead, serve, and love.

So—what would it look like for you to start your day with intention? What small shift can you make this week to protect your best energy for yourself?

You don’t have to overhaul everything. Just start with one intentional choice.

You've got this. And we're celebrating you.